Life, as far as I can tell, is a wild goose chase…. a grunion run where the grunion are still in the ocean, not on the beach.  We search and search for our grunion horde only to find sticky damp sand and cold irritated noses.  The grunion are gone, but the beach is still there, the friend (who you didn’t know would become a best friend) sitting on your lap for warmth is still there. The thrill of the chase, though not successful, still there.

My eye has been on the prize since I was 17 years old.  Why Westmont? Well, because it’s close to home, it’s Christian, it’s a 4 year teaching program, and I’ll go to Costa Rica. Why 18-21 units a semester? To go to Costa Rica.  Why are you working a ton? To stay at Westmont… to go to Costa Rica.  Since the launch and departure of my college career every class, every step, was originally intended to bring me closer to that all consuming goal- Costa Frickin’ Rica.

Well, I’m here and like the grunion run that I went on all those summers ago, I’m missing my fish.  I got here and whatever I was hoping to find still eludes me.  I thought the grunion would be on the beach, but they aren’t.  What I found on this particular wild goose chase has proved to be infinitely better than any flopping silver googley eyed pez.

I found family, or should I say families.  Since my second departure (graduation) I have realized more than I had in January, how much I love my Santa Barbara family.  You know who you are because I made overbearing efforts to see you. True, there are those that have been part of my formation that I was not hell bent on seeing, but if I was with you at any point in time during that whirlwind of a weekend, I hope you know that I didn’t want to be anywhere else, or with anybody else in the world.

When I had to come… “home” though, back to Costa Rica, I was faced with the slaphappy prospect of returning to my other family unit, Las Chicas de Rosa Umana.  Just before boarding the plane Nadia and I called the girls to tell them we were on our way… If I could bottle/record Miranda and Greta’s voices when they heard us on the other end I’m not sure you could withstand the bubbling laughter and incandescent elation that ensued.

And so it is at the close of the hunt, the last 16 days, that I have come to terms with the fact that I have no grunion to show for my efforts. All I have is the ride in the open-roof trailer, the flippin’ rickety and bumpy ride with squeaky rusty hinges, the numb butt, warm heart, and friends next to me- all of us searching for something, only coming to find that the most important part of the chase is the fact that we’re running together.

To find people you love that love you back with the same fuerza, I think that may be the grunion that God was intending us to find… But who knows, I suppose that will be my question: Was the point of the grunion run to actually find the grunion or was it to find the people I want to know for the rest of forever?

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